Leading Her Introvert Way: Conversations about executive leadership, career growth, business and mindset for mid-life Black women.

91: What Black Introverted Women Gain When They Lead With Executive Power

• Nicole Bryan • Episode 91

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In this episode, Dr. Nicole Bryan challenges the narrative that Black female introverts staying out of power is noble and emphasizes the importance of redefining success, embracing responsibility, and using power strategically to create meaningful change within corporate environments. The conversation highlights the psychological barriers that prevent women from stepping into leadership roles and encourages listeners to recognize their potential to transform the establishment from within.



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*Reserve your seat today for the free session July 26th: “From Invisible to Invincible: Strategies for Black Introvert Women to Get Executive Promotions in Five Months or Less.” 

Speaker 1:

Hi, lady Leader, and welcome to another episode of the Leading Her Introvert Way podcast. My name is Dr Nicole Bryan, and I help Black introverted women get promoted to senior leadership, become elite leaders and build generational wealth. So I don't know about you, but I'm thinking how the heck is it already mid-July? If you're listening to this real time, half the year has already gone, and you probably started 2025 out saying that this was going to be your year, both on a personal level and a professional level. You likely said that this was going to be the year that you got yourself your promotion, the one that you've been thinking about and coveting for years. At this point, you also said that this was going to be the year that you stood out and stood up for something in your professional life that made you the leader that you always wanted to be. If that's you, my dear introvert friend, then I invite you to join me. On July 26th at 10 am Eastern Standard Time, I'm hosting a free webinar where I'm going to walk you through my proprietary promotion strategy that has helped hundreds of introvert women get their executive leadership role. The reason why this webinar is so cool is because it was designed for introverts like you and me, because all of those traditional advice the steps that people tell others to take in order to get promoted they don't work for introverts like you and me, because it requires way too much energy, it doesn't cater to our strengths and, frankly, most of that advice in terms of your career is outdated. What I've been able to design, using myself and my clients as prototypes, is a specific five-step strategy that will get you promoted into your senior level leadership role this year. Not next year, not five years from now, but within five months or less. If you're ready to join and you're ready to make your move, then definitely go to the show notes and click the link. If you can't hit the show notes, then go to my LinkedIn profile and it's going to be at the top of the page.

Speaker 1:

Reserve your seat today, okay, so let's jump into today's topic, which is all about the concerns that many of us, as introvert women, have when it comes to executive power. I need to have a real conversation with you as a Black introvert woman, because you have likely convinced yourself that staying out of senior leadership is somehow noble. You have probably already made it to middle management and you're thinking I've got enough, I don't want to be part of the problem. Sis, I'm here to tell you that that narrative you've convinced yourself of is not protecting your integrity, but it is protecting their power structure. Integrity, but it is protecting their power structure.

Speaker 1:

If you have ever thought that pursuing executive leadership means selling out or becoming part of the establishment, then this episode is going to challenge everything you believe about power, about authenticity and about your responsibility to your community. Let's start with the thinking of us versus them. So the narrative that is holding you back and making you stay powerless. It involves a mindset of fear and a lie. The mindset is that we, as Black people, versus them, the establishment. Right, that's the mindset that we have all been reared in, we have all grown up in and that we all frankly subscribe to. It's us, black people, versus them, the establishment or the system. The fear that is incorporated in that is if I become an executive, I become part of the system, I become the establishment, I become part of the system, I become the establishment, I become part of them, and I've spent my entire life, my family has spent their entire lives fighting or resisting against them quote unquote or them, the establishment. So our fear is we don't wanna become part of that. And if we become an executive, we automatically become part of the establishment. The lie that has been holding us back is staying out of power protects my authenticity and my community loyalty. Right, that's what we're saying to ourselves. Now you may not be saying this to yourself directly, but indirectly it's what you're thinking that staying out of power protects you, keeps you real right, makes you authentic, makes you loyal to your community.

Speaker 1:

How this shows up in your career is that you get to your manager or director level role and you start thinking I'm good, like this is enough, because really you start making like six figures, maybe close to six figures, and that's way more than you even imagined when you were in school and it's for sure, more than most, if not everybody, in your family. So, hey, yeah, I'm at the manager level, I'm at the director level, I don't need to go much further. That's what you're saying to yourself. The other way this shows up is that you see executives, other executives, who are toxic, and you decide I don't want to be like that. Not only do I want to, don't want to be like that, I don't want other people to think that I may be like that. And if I go for an executive role or a senior leadership role, people automatically are going to lump me in with them those people, those executives, who are poor leaders and toxic, and I don't want that.

Speaker 1:

Another way this shows up in your career today is that you convince yourself that executive ambition means that you are selling out. Like, if you do land an executive role, then that automatically means that you are selling out, that you can't stand for the things that you always stood for, that you can't speak out against things and philosophies and ways of managing that you don't agree with. And then, finally, this also shows up in your career when you tell yourself you're doing fine where you are, but you're not because you already have ambitions beyond that. But you've started to suppress those ambitions, you've tried to ignore those ambitions. Yet when you see other people moving their career along or doing things different than you are doing right now, you feel some sort of way, and I get it.

Speaker 1:

There is a psychology behind this fear, and, if you are new to me, one of the things that we always talk about here is not just what is happening, but why it's happening, and usually that relates to the psychology behind it. So, if you are navigating this fear of stepping into your true power or into power within your corporate environment, there is a fear there, and part of that fear is around your identity conflict, because you, as a Black, introverted woman, you are caught between individual success and community belonging. Now there's this false belief that you can't be both you can't authentically be Black and an executive. But this is a psychological trap that serves the system, the same system that you don't want to support. This serves that system. It does not serve you.

Speaker 1:

Another psychological concept that you need to think about here is about moral licensing. Now, you think that by staying out of positions of power, you're taking the moral high ground, but in truth, avoiding responsibility isn't morality, it's abdication. Every day that you stay out of senior leadership, you're making a choice. You're choosing to let other people, people who may not share your values or care about your community. You're choosing to allow them to make the decisions that affect everyone, instead of you being in the position where you get to make decisions about everyone, meaning decisions that affect everyone else, right, literally, when you choose to stay out of executive leadership, you are handing over your power and your authority to other people who you likely wouldn't even trust to walk your dog. The establishment will benefit from your absence, and so who wins when you stay out of power? Well, the very system that you think you're opposing wins when qualified Black women like yourself avoid executive roles.

Speaker 1:

Now, I am not saying and I'm not trying to ignore all the barriers that we face inside of a corporate environment, right, barriers that we face inside of a corporate environment, right, we, as Black women, hands down, face the most, not just the most in number, but the most severe barriers in nine to five roles. But that still does not mean that it's an excuse for us, as Black women, to avoid executive roles, for us, as Black women, to avoid executive roles, because if we avoid the executive roles, then how is anything ever going to change? We need people who look like us, who think like us, who are us, to be in those executive roles and executive positions so we can start making different decisions, decisions that are different from what people who have historically been in those roles have made. Right, the establishment will stay exactly the same because you're not there to change it, and the status quo will be maintained. Because you feel like you are too noble to be present, you think that you're fighting the system by staying out of it, but you are actually supporting it, because the system loves when capable Black women self-select out of power. It makes their job easier. What you're really protecting is their comfort with the current power structure. You're protecting their ability to make decisions without diverse perspectives. You're protecting their narrative that people like us, people like you and people like me don't belong in executive roles. So instead of asking how do I stay authentic, you should be asking how can I use executive power differently than they do? What would change if someone with my values was making these decisions? How can I transform this system from the inside out and what is my responsibility to the people who come after me?

Speaker 1:

When you avoid power, in the stance of trying to stay authentic, you've internalized the very limitations the system wants you to have. You're doing exactly what they want you to do. You're doing their work for them right, their discriminatory work for them. Power doesn't corrupt character. It reveals character, and if you're worried about what power might reveal about you, you're exactly the person who should have it.

Speaker 1:

I hear from countless women say that they don't want that level of responsibility. They don't want that level of authority. Yet the same Black introverted women who make that statement are the very first in line to criticize decisions that have been made by those who are in authority. And almost every Black woman that I encounter has her own ideas, has different suggestions on how things should be done, has desires where the whole ecosystem could look different. Yet at the same time, they're saying but I don't want that responsibility. Do you want the responsibility, sis, or don't you want the responsibility? Do you secretly want the responsibility but you don't want to put yourself out there? That's the fair talking. Do you secretly want the responsibility but you don't want to put yourself out there? That's the fair talking. Do you have a vision on the idea that your boss put out last week and you know that it could be done completely differently and better, but he or she is in a more senior level than you are, so they get to make the final decision and not you? That's the type of thing that happens. Right, you are sitting in the room and you're hearing the discussion and you know that what they're putting forth is not gonna work. But if you were in their role, or even in a more senior role, you could make the right thing happen. You could make the better decision, but you're not doing that because you've not put yourself in the position to do it.

Speaker 1:

The difference between executives is that executives who misuse power, they are serving themselves and their own interests. Executives who transform systems which that's the executive that you and I are going to be they serve their values and their communities. The difference isn't whether you have power. It's actually how you use the power that you have. What changes when you have executive authority? Well, you can change budget decisions that can fund community programs. You can change hiring practices that can open doors for people who look like you. You can change policies right. You create policies that support working families. You create mentorship opportunities that can develop the next generation of leaders. You can change the strategic direction that can align business goals with social impact.

Speaker 1:

The real betrayal isn't becoming an executive. It's having the capability to create change and to be an executive, but choosing not to pursue the platform to do it. Power is not the enemy, powerlessness is. Executive authority is not selling out. It's buying into your ability to create change. And joining the establishment isn't the goal. Transforming the establishment is the goal, and the only way you're going to do that is to be a part of it to be present, to seek the roles that are more senior, so that you have the decision making authority that comes along with it. Your community needs you at the executive level because they need someone who understands their struggles making budget decisions. They need someone who shares their values, setting organizational direction. They need someone who looks like them, proving what is possible, and they need executives who will use their platform to speak up, to speak out and to create opportunities. By staying at your current level, you're not protecting anyone. You're not even protecting yourself. You're just ensuring that executive decisions continue to be made without your perspective, without your values and without your voice.

Speaker 1:

Here's a framework for authentic executive power that you can use, and there's four steps to it. The first is I want you to redefine what success looks like. Success is not avoiding the establishment. Success for you can and should look like transforming the establishment from the inside out. It should look like you sitting at that leadership table and debating and recommending things to your colleagues and to your peers. That's what success should look like. Success should look like you earning a executive income of multi-six figures year after year. That's step one redefining what success could look like For you to establish authentic executive power. Step two is embracing your responsibility. You have a responsibility to yourself, to your family, to your community, to the organization, to pursue the influence that could create the changes your community needs.

Speaker 1:

Step number three is using power strategically. What happens for us is we have seen so many other leaders use power in a negative way, in a toxic way, that unfortunately, we are so caught up in that that it's very difficult for us to imagine a different experience, right? But you, you, my friend, could be using executive power with every executive decision as an opportunity to align business outcomes with social impact. Let me just say, as a side note, for me, ever since I have had the pleasure of being a leader and that's from being a junior leader to a senior leader, to an executive One of my favorite responsibilities, whether it's written on a piece of paper or not, is to nurture the next generation of talent, not just by being there, not just by them seeing me in that role and seeing me make decisions and showing what's possible, but by actually taking the time to demonstrate and teach and engage that next generation so that they can see and feel and experience what good leadership, what integrity-based leadership, what servant leadership actually looks like, and the reason why that's important to me is because I recognize that executive leadership or leadership isn't just about something that happens when you're on the job. It's not something that happens or impacts you from nine to five, literally.

Speaker 1:

When you have a good leader, when you are a good leader, your reach goes way beyond that role that you might be responsible for. It reaches into people's personal lives. It reaches down to their children. It reaches through the generations, right, and so when I talk about using power strategically, it's not just about what you do on the job. It's about how you influence other people and how they lead, how you influence how people think lead, how you influence how people think, how you influence the values that they create and that they live by. That is true power. That is how you can use your executive power strategically. And the fourth step is creating pathways. You literally your executive success. It creates roadmaps for others to follow. Whether you're aware of it or not, people see you, people remember you and people will emulate you. The system does not change because good people avoid it. It changes because good people enter it with the intention to transform it.

Speaker 1:

One of the other things that I hear many women talk about is particularly those who want to be entrepreneurs, and sometimes we're faced right. Many of us are faced with hey, do I stay in my nine to five or do I go the entrepreneurial route? What I hear many entrepreneurs say is that going the entrepreneurial route is the only way that they can make true change, and I got to call BS on that. After having a 30 plus year career working in a nine to five environment in both nonprofits and for-profits organizations, I can unequivocally say that I have been able to leave a lasting impact. I have been able to make global positive changes through my nine to five career, and so can you.

Speaker 1:

Being an entrepreneur is not the only way to make a difference. Frankly, I think each and every one of us can make a difference in any setting that we're in. What I love about making a difference in a nine to five or a corporate setting is that all of the resources are already there. It's right for the taking. I don't have to create something new and different, meaning I don't have to create something new on my own right, because that takes a level of effort that many of us are not up to, and if we are up to it. We don't want to do that.

Speaker 1:

I have always been an advocate for if it already exists, I don't need to recreate the wheel. What I need to do is figure out how I can make that wheel turn for me versus the opposite, how I can make that wheel benefit the masses versus just that corporate environment right, how I can literally take the resources that are there and available and spread them wider and deeper so that I can make the impact that I want to make. That, to me, is what and how I like to use the executive power, and you can do the same thing, so you can continue protecting their comfort with your limitations, or you can pursue the executive power that threatens their status quo. The choice is yours. But remember, choosing powerlessness is not noble. It's strategic self-sabotage. Your fear of becoming part of the establishment is actually helping the establishment maintain its power. The revolution happens when you stop avoiding executive roles and start transforming them from the inside.

Speaker 1:

This week, I want you to identify three changes you could make if you had executive authority. Then I want you to ask yourself is my current position of limited power serving myself or my community better than executive influence? Would Be honest about your answer Again. If you're ready to stop protecting their power structure with your absence and start using executive authority to create real change, then join me on July 26th at 10 am Eastern, for From Invisible to Invincible. It is a free webinar, but I'm gonna be sharing some very proprietary steps on how you can get your executive promotion in five months or less, so essentially before the end of this year, sis. I'll show you exactly how to pursue executive power while staying true to your values and to your community.

Speaker 1:

Remember, the establishment benefits from your fear of power. Your community benefits from your courage to pursue it. So stop playing small when the world needs your leadership at scale and until next time, keep leading your introvert way. That's a wrap for this episode of Leading Her Way. Thanks for tuning in. If you have thoughts, questions or ideas for future topics, connect and send me a message on LinkedIn and if you enjoyed today's episode, subscribe. And please take a minute to write a quick review on Apple Podcasts. Your review will help spread the word to other ambitious females so they know they're not alone and that this podcast is a community of support for all of us leading her way to the top. Remember your leadership is needed. Your leadership is powerful, so lead boldly Until next time.